Home The Mixed Hair Care Guide You Needed


When you got ‘em, you got ‘em!

And the fact that *YOU* are reading this page means your kids have ‘em.

Now, that means you’re either having a lot of fun or a lot of frustration trying to figure out how to keep their mixed hair healthy and well-groomed with what little time you have left in your schedule…

“Any Dad taking interest in doing their daughters hair with simple yet great looking hairstyles, this is definitely the spot!”


Hi! I’m Victoria…

In the past 10 years since I became a full-time YouTuber, I’ve helped thousands of Moms just like you to “detangle” the mysteries – and joys – of mixed-race hair… Beautiful, “curly girl” hair.

Apart from caring for my three beautiful mixed-raced kids’ hair (none of which have the same curl pattern, of course!), I’ve experimented endlessly on my own hair: I’ve straightened it, relaxed it, texturized it, texlaxed it, cut it, grown it long, and even helped it come back after postpartum hair loss.

All to say: if it has to do with natural hair care and styling, I’ve done it.

(I’ve even attended some trichology school for good measure).

“Just wanted to say thank you for these hairstyles and care tips! I’m a white stepmom and these have helped so much in caring for my stepdaughter’s hair. We’ve tried several hairstyles and they are adorable!”

Alexandra W

(Almost) Everything I’ve Learned Is In This Guide:


Look, I’ll be 100% honest. I’ve put all of this information on my Youtube channel at one point or another.

But this guide brings all of the best information together in one place, so you don’t have to watch videos just to remember the most important points.

Basically, this eBook Guide is a shortcut.

You can simply pull it up on your phone before you wash your kids’ hair, and viola! All the information is right there at your fingertips.

There are plenty of easy-to-understand graphics that help you understand your kid’s mixed hair and do the right thing to care for it and nurture its growth.

“Thanks. A single dad here and struggling with doing my daughters hair till I found this. thanks”

Seb B

Here’s Just A Small Taste of What’s Inside:

  • 17 of my BEST tips for mixed hair care and styling with mixed-race children.
  • The 4 DIFFERENT categories of hair – and how you can care for and style each. Pg. 4.
  • Hair porosity – what it is, why it matters, and what you should do about it. Pg. 5
  • 5 simple, to-the-point video links that give you extra detail exactly where you need it.
  • Caring for optimum hair health with a busy schedule and a kid on the go!
  • How and when to wash your kid’s hair to avoid damage and protect natural curls. Pg. 7
  • How to detangle, style, and protect your kid’s mixed hair
  • How to encourage growth in your child’s hair and give them abundant curly locks. Pg. 11
  • Preventing split ends, breakage, and stress on your child’s hair Pg. 12
  • Working with fussy, squirmy kids and getting great results! Pg. 13
  • Is natural hair really nappy? The answer may surprise you. Pg. 15
  • And so much more!


Sophie September 16, 2022 - 6:38 pm

Do you also cover the tools and products you use? Thx

victoriavadenking September 22, 2022 - 9:00 pm

Hi! There are links to my amazon store with a complete list by curl type and also a few youtube video links.

Aurora September 22, 2022 - 6:09 pm

I have zero patience when it comes to watching videos – this is why I’m not hating the reels/tiktoks trend that is huge now so this guide is the best route for me. The thing is, will it work on teen hair that’s damaged from excessive dyeing?

victoriavadenking September 22, 2022 - 9:04 pm

Reels/tutorials are definitely on the rise right now. I was hoping this would be a condensed “read when you need.” The overview of hair care will DEFINITELY help because I have dyed, relaxed, and transitioned my hair about six times, so I can relate!

Nora September 26, 2022 - 9:24 am

Congrats, Victoria, that sounds like an amazing product!

victoriavadenking September 28, 2022 - 12:12 pm

Thanks, I’m excited to share it in a condensed version!

Erin Walters September 29, 2022 - 2:24 pm

This sounds like it would fix a lot of issues for me! I’m the classic blonde lob California girl so not that much maintenance in my case but I could use the info for my mixed race kids, they’re past their toddler phase and it’s a LOT to deal with 😀

victoriavadenking October 3, 2022 - 4:39 pm

I have several friends who are similar, and I created this with you all (and dads) in mind 🙂

Kayla October 1, 2022 - 7:14 am

Can you recommend safe products that work well with mixed hair that don’t cost a fortune?

victoriavadenking October 5, 2022 - 1:25 pm

Yes! Majority of the products I mention (practically everywhere on social media) are affordable. I’m a mom of three kids, so I understand. Here’s an example of Target products I love and use: https://doyouevenmom.com/best-curly-hair-products-at-target/

Bella October 3, 2022 - 7:39 am

You’re always hustling, girl! Proud of you, hard work always pays off!

victoriavadenking October 3, 2022 - 4:38 pm

Thanks so much!

Payton October 6, 2022 - 9:52 am

New follower here, can’t wait to give this a go! I have two mixed children with curly hair which leaves me with very little room for improv.

victoriavadenking October 30, 2022 - 7:34 pm

I have three small kids all with three different curly hair. I am right there with you. Each day is a new day to improve though 🙂 (And get your kiddos involved!)

Victor October 8, 2022 - 2:12 am

I see mostly moms commenting here so yeah, kinda the odd one out, but as a proud black dad I want to learn how to do this on my own, my fiance has a lot on her plate right now so this would be a nice surprise for her.

victoriavadenking October 30, 2022 - 7:35 pm

YAY!! I get a ton of comments from dads on my Youtube channel so def not the odd one out! Here’s a recent video I did if you want to connect with other dads in the comment section: https://youtu.be/b_rLC3L61JU

Lauren October 10, 2022 - 12:56 pm

I thought I could manage all by myself but mixed hair care is truly something else. Thanks for putting this together!

victoriavadenking October 30, 2022 - 7:35 pm

Of course! I hope it’s super helpful for you 🙂

Gianna October 10, 2022 - 12:56 pm

I LOLed when I read about having all this info already mentioned in some of your older videos, love your honesty!

victoriavadenking October 30, 2022 - 7:33 pm

LOL!! Girl yes, 10 years worth LOL

Morgan October 10, 2022 - 12:57 pm

‘Preventing split ends, breakage, and stress ‘ – this is a pretty big problem for us right now, I feel like everything I’m doing is making it worse.

victoriavadenking October 30, 2022 - 7:32 pm

I’m only an email or Instagram DM away if you ever have questions!

Alexandra October 14, 2022 - 12:44 pm

Yes to this! I’m a tad afraid of messing up my girl’s curls, I feel like a complete beginner #noob

victoriavadenking October 30, 2022 - 7:32 pm

Even having curly hair my entire life, I am still learning since all of my kids have three different curl patterns.

Molly October 14, 2022 - 12:47 pm

I’ve watched one or two of your videos, you are so sweet and you always deliver.

victoriavadenking October 30, 2022 - 7:31 pm

Oh that just means the world to me. Thank you so much 🙂

Destiny October 18, 2022 - 9:25 am

Clara is just a baby but I’m doing my homework, guys, I hate surprises. Fingers crossed I can keep up…

victoriavadenking October 30, 2022 - 7:31 pm

Great job for you getting a headstart!

Mackenzie October 20, 2022 - 2:52 am

I feel like I’m overwashing his hair. Is every three days too much? If so, what can I do to aim for four or five days?

victoriavadenking October 30, 2022 - 7:31 pm

For curly hair, generally speaking, you don’t need to wash hair often. BUT, it depends on your child. When Mya was younger, and she was in soccer and had longer playtime at daycare vs elementary school, I washed her hair more. But, now it’s every 7-10 days. If you’re going to wash every three-four or even five days, utilize a really good co-wash so you’re not constantly stripping his/her curly hair that often. Here are a few of my faves: https://doyouevenmom.com/type-2-hair-products/

Autumn October 23, 2022 - 7:10 pm

I have to admit defeat and buy this, I feel like I’m so winging it and it’s not cutting it anymore, I am officially overwhelmed.

victoriavadenking October 30, 2022 - 7:28 pm

You are an amazing mom to take this first step. Trust me, this will be an amazing bonding and learning experience for both of you 🙂

Jocelyn October 26, 2022 - 6:16 pm

Thanks for this, will report back as soon as I get it.

victoriavadenking October 30, 2022 - 7:27 pm

You’ve got this!

Faith October 28, 2022 - 9:39 am

My daughter has healthy, gorgeous hair but it tangles like craaazy! Checking this asap!

victoriavadenking October 30, 2022 - 7:27 pm

OOh yes, also check out this walkthrough video that is super easy on detangling mixed hair: https://youtu.be/BXNLeorxxoU

Aida November 22, 2022 - 5:09 am

Thank you so much for sharing this video, Victoria! It was so helpful for my little Lisa.

Lucy October 29, 2022 - 6:56 pm

White mom with zero knowledge and I truly mean zero! I’m so happy I discovered your guide, bought it already, can’t wait to put it to practice tomorrow.

victoriavadenking October 30, 2022 - 7:25 pm

Please let me know how it works out for you! In the meantime, hopefully you’ll find these posts helpful as well: https://doyouevenmom.com/category/hair/mixed-curly-hair/

Mariah October 31, 2022 - 4:39 am

Do you recommend nightcaps for kids?

victoriavadenking November 28, 2022 - 11:04 pm

I have a post I am currently writing about nightcaps. Depending on the age of your child, I think they’re very helpful but once your little one is a little older when you don’t have to worry about it covering their nose and mouth which is of course dangerous. But, you also have to get a great brand that does not easily slide off. One of my girls is a rough sleeper, and the other isn’t, so I haven’t found a nightcap that works for both of them.


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victoria vaden

a diaper duties mom blog


victoria vaden king

Victoria Vaden

Original YouTuber when ‘viral’ was just a flu symptom. My English degree qualified me to tell stories (the good kind). So, I'm sharing the not-so-normal reality of motherhood and marriage.

victoria vaden king family

My Story

DYEM is for the not-so-perfect, spit-up-stained, smile-through-anything moms out there looking for sanity. Motherhood is messy and full of mistakes. You'll find plenty of that here.

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