It’s a hectic morning, the clock is ticking, and you’re desperately trying to do easy toddler hair styles for your kiddos.
But, they’re squirming, you’re panicking, and somehow, the hairbrush seems to have transformed into a hidden torture device.
If you’ve given up (or barely begun) hairstyling your kids’ natural hair, don’t throw hair brush out the window just yet.
As a black mom of three beautiful mixed race children, each with their own unique curl patterns, I’ve been through it all.
And trust me, caring for mixed hair types is not as complicated as society led you to believe.
This post is all about toddler hair styles.
I Won’t Judge if You Jump Ahead
Let’s Iron Out the Not-So-Obvious…
I shared this in a previous post, but just to be clear (or clearer).
Throughout this post and on my blog, you’ll come across the phrases “mixed hair” and “biracial hair.”
These terms refer to the hair of a child who has parents from different or multiple racial backgrounds.
It’s worth mentioning that there are individuals who find these terms offensive, but we won’t delve into that discussion here.
The truth is that in terms of SEO and how parents search for information, these terms have become relevant.
Essentially, we’re referring to curly hair.
Nothing more. Nothing less.
Confessions of a Formerly Chemically Straightened Mom
Let me introduce myself—I’m Victoria Vaden, the ex-YouTuber turned Children’s Author on a mission to help parents conquer the challenges of maintaining and caring for their kids’ mixed curly hair.
Over a decade ago, I launched my YouTube channel, offering guidance to anyone struggling with hair growth.
Along the way, I’ve embarked on some wild DIY hair experiments (like putting Monistat on my scalp for faster hair growth).
But here’s the scoop on my diverse household’s hair types: I’ve been happily married to my husband, Toné (4c).
Together, we have three amazing kids: Mya, with 3A/3B curls, Mariah has 3C/4B spirals, and Noah with a mix of 1/2A waves.
(Oh, and we can’t forget our furry family members: Takoda the Golden Retriever, and Avera, our Poodle Rottweiler mix.)
Ready to save your sanity, one curl at a time? Check out my Mixed Hair Care Guide.
The Teasing Wake-Up Call
Just because I sport curly locks like my kids doesn’t automatically mean I had all the answers. Oh no, not even close.
My mom, bless her heart, knew I was too lazy to deal with my curly hair, so she waved her magic wand of chemicals (a relaxer) and straightened it when I was 12.
And let me tell you, I embraced that easy-breezy hair routine with open arms.
For years, I stuck to the chemically straightened life (until college, to be exact).
And then, after the birth of my daughters, I repeated the cycle.
But one fateful day in sunny Florida, my oldest daughter was being teasing for her curly hair.
Ironically, the little girl teasing her was the only student in the class with straight, blonde hair.
That was my breaking point, my aha moment and I chopped off my chemically straightened her later that night.
It was a radical move, but it sent a powerful message to my daughter.
I wanted her to know that her curls were beautiful and that her mama had them too.
All of this to say: I wasn’t the girl who grew up obsessing over hair care, following trends, or trying new styles.
Barbies and baby dolls were foreign creatures to me.
When I became a mom, I had to start from scratch, learning the ropes of baby hair care and toddler hair styles.
It was like learning to salsa dance with two left feet, but hey, we all have to start somewhere.
Mirror, Mirror on the Wall: It’s Just Hair After All
“It’s just hair,” is the most ridiculous excuse uttered by some parents who view hair as a mere afterthought.
But when it comes to curly hair, especially the unique curls of our mixed race children, we must challenge this notion.
Curly hair requires a different approach compared to straight or even wavy hair.
As a black mom with naturally curly hair myself, I know firsthand that each curl pattern is unique, and what works for my hair may not work for my children’s hair.
There’s an unwritten parental decree: your little one should outshine you before stepping out the door.
But it’s not about vanity or surface-level appearances—it’s about nurturing their confidence and fostering a positive self-image.
From that mirror at home to the bustling school hallways, your child should radiate the same assurance and empowerment that you exude when you put in the effort to present yourself with pride.
Ignoring Curly Hair’s Power to Empower
It’s an integral part of our child’s identity, and by neglecting it, we risk eroding their self-esteem and confidence.
Embrace the opportunity to educate yourself about your child’s specific curl pattern, invest in quality products suited for their hair type, and explore different styling techniques that highlight the beauty of their curls.
Together, let’s ensure that our children grow up knowing they have stunning, manageable hair that deserves love and care.
Remember, it’s not about conforming to societal standards.
It’s about embracing the uniqueness of our children’s hair and empowering them to love and appreciate themselves as they are.
By doing so, we break the cycle of self-doubt and foster a sense of pride in their natural beauty.
We need to be the parents who teach our children to love their curls, one wash, style, and smile at a time.
Breaking Free from the ‘Mommy, No More Afro!’ Struggles
Okay, parents, I’m talking to you—especially if you come from a different background than your curly-haired child.
In American society, let’s face the harsh truth: curly hair is still often seen as “nappy hair.”
Now, we are making progress, but we’re not there yet.
So, when your child steps out with their constant frizz and what society perceives as “nappy hair,” remember the battle they might face.
It’s time to pick up a few products, arm yourselves with the right tools, and face this challenge head-on so that your child doesn’t have to do it alone.
Let me tell you, the comments I receive on my YouTube channel from teenagers are eye-opening.
They express their longing for their moms to have taught them how to care for their own hair.
Instead, they were left with frizzy poofs, fairy knots, or worst of all—being forced to straighten or cut their hair to “maintain” it.
It breaks my heart, and it’s a reminder of the battles these young ones face when they should be celebrating their natural beauty.
Let me share a personal anecdote with you.
My husband is biracial; and for the longest time, he believed that no one on the planet had a hair type like his.
He saw his hair as unmanageable and kept it cut short, almost military-style.
It wasn’t until we got married that I realized how deep his disgust was for his own curls.
(And now it makes sense why he preferred me wearing my straight hair when we were dating.)
It’s been a work in progress, but he’s slowly learning that he never had “bad” hair — just the wrong products and technique.
Our children, too, deserve to understand and appreciate the beauty of their unique curls, and it starts with us, as parents, taking the time to care for their hair properly.
Toddler Hair Nightmares That Make Kids Scream for a Stylist
Alright, let’s address this head-on.
The excuse of not knowing where to start when it comes to caring for your child’s natural or curly hair is simply unacceptable.
When you found out you were expecting a child, did you spend time researching the best strollers, cribs, and baby products?
Did you diligently read parenting books and attend prenatal classes to ensure you were prepared?
Well, caring for your child’s hair should be no different.
It’s a part of their identity, and neglecting it is neglecting a crucial aspect of their well-being.
Let’s put things into perspective.
You can spend minutes upon minutes waiting in the Starbucks drive-thru line or scrolling mindlessly through social media.
Let’s redirect some of that time and energy towards the wealth of knowledge at your fingertips, invest in the well-being of your child’s hair, and make it a priority to learn how to properly care for their natural or curly locks.
You owe it to your child to be informed, prepared, and committed to their overall health and self-esteem.
No More Wiggle Room for this Excuse
They have an uncanny ability to turn a simple task like hairstyling into an Olympic event of dodging brushes and squirming away.
There are ways to tame the toddler hair style tantrums and turn them into willing participants in the hairstyling adventure.
Let’s face it, kids have short attention spans.
Expecting them to sit still for an extended period of time is like trying to catch a unicorn—it’s just not going to happen.
But hey, distractions are a parent’s best friend!
It’s all about turning hairstyling into a positive and enjoyable experience for both of you.
Here’s a secret weapon: find something that captivates your child’s attention.
Offer a tempting snack, hand them an iPad to watch their favorite show, or engage them with a storybook or coloring activity.
You’ll be surprised how much easier it is to work with their hair when they’re immersed in something they enjoy.
The key is to use these distractions strategically, creating a positive association with hairstyling so that neither of you ends up frustrated.
No More Tears, Only Cheers
My middle child, Mariah, possesses a tender scalp that could rival the sensitivity of a princess’s pea.
When I first attempted to touch her little curls, she would unleash screams that made it seem as if the world itself was ending.
It was a daunting challenge that lasted for months, and even now, at the age of four, she occasionally lets out a yelp when I come across the tiniest snag or have to unravel a curly knot.
However, I am proud to say that we have made significant progress since those early days of hair care battles.
Through patience, gentle techniques, and a sprinkle of distraction, Mariah’s tolerance has improved immensely.
Though she may still voice her objections with a shriek or two, I can confidently say that she is far better off than she was two years ago.
Keep in mind that our ultimate goal is to ensure our children have a positive relationship with their hair.
We don’t want them growing up thinking their hair is too much to handle or a hassle to deal with.
That mentality only reinforces societal pressures that anything other than straight hair is “too difficult.”
Unmasking the Lazy Parent Syndrome
We’re all superheroes disguised as parents, constantly battling against the ticking clock.
But here’s the secret: you don’t need to be a hair wizard or a stylist extraordinaire.
Say goodbye to the “it’s too much work” excuse because while curly hair may take more effort, choosing to just not do it is not an excuse.
It’s not about intricate updos every single day (unless you’ve got some amazing skills, then go you!).
Simple routines and styles can work wonders in keeping those curls happy and healthy.
Whether it’s a quick wash-and-go or a neat and tidy ponytail, find what works for you and your little tornado of curls.
But here’s the real twist (pun intended): it’s not just about the hair.
It’s about the bond you build while navigating the curl chaos opportunity for connection and self-expression.
Make hairstyling a quirky adventure, where your child’s imagination takes the stage.
Let them choose their own toddler hair style or be the official assistant in the wild hair rodeo.
Crank up their favorite tunes, have a dance-off, or share stories that’ll make their curls bounce with joy.
These precious moments become memories that will forever hold a special place in both your hearts.
‘I Woke Up Like This’ Bedhead Doesn’t Cut It!
Let’s unravel the truth behind the popular “I woke up like this” trend with its gloriously messy and unkempt hair.
Now, I get it—it’s tempting to hop aboard the bandwagon and join the ranks of effortlessly tousled hair.
But let’s peel back the layers and dive into the real story.
Better yet, just go to the mall and people-watch in the food court.
Don’t watch for the mom of the mixed race child. Watch the surrounding tables instead.
I guarantee you you’ll feel the weight of judgmental stares and disapproving glances as they walk by.
If you’re a different race than your child, it’s a situation that you’ve probably never faced personally.
But if you have noticed [while with your child], you’ll know it’s about as enjoyable as stepping on a LEGO barefoot.
In one of my YouTube videos, I discussed the importance of hair care and its direct correlation to self-confidence.
Geez, did I receive an earful from offended moms who didn’t quite appreciate my no-nonsense approach!
But here’s the thing—when you ask any mixed race child who grew up with neglected or poorly cared-for curls, they’ll testify to the impact it had on their self-esteem.
Still don’t believe me?
Check out this video from a biracial YouTuber titled “Stop Neglecting Black/Biracial Curly Hair.”
As you watch, take a quick peek at the comments section, but prepare yourself for a rollercoaster ride of emotions.
You’ll witness the stories, the pain, and the scars left behind by parents who simply didn’t put in the time or effort to learn how to properly care for their child’s precious curls.
The damage inflicted on these [now] teenage and young adults’ self-image is raw and real.
Sure, there may be those unavoidable moments when our hair goes haywire, but neglecting those precious curls altogether sends a message—a painful one—that their natural beauty isn’t worthy of attention or care.
The investment in your child’s self-esteem will outweigh any passing trend or societal pressure.
Toddler Hair Styles Dads Can Do, So Why Aren’t You?
While I can understand that this may be the only reason for confusion and lack of knowledge, let’s be clear: it’s not an excuse.
Times are changing, and dads all around the world are stepping up and proving that hair care knows no gender boundaries.
Sure, it may not come naturally to some dads to know how to style their child’s hair.
After all, they didn’t grow up with hair tutorials and braiding practice. But guess what?
These dads are adapting, learning, and showcasing their skills on social media for the world to see!
I’ve even shared some of those adorable dad-created toddler hair styles with my own husband, who was once clueless in this department.
If these dads can figure out how to navigate uncharted territory and create fabulous hairstyles, there’s absolutely zero excuse for anyone to resort to damaging techniques like using a straightener or sticking to outdated styling methods.
We’re living in an era where dads are proving that they can rock the styling and profiling game just as well as anyone else.
Whether it’s learning how to braid, mastering the perfect ponytail, or exploring other creative styles, they’re proving that hair care is a skill that can be acquired by anyone willing to put in the effort.
But just in case you’re wondering exactly how to style toddler girl hair for dads, don’t worry, I’ve got you covered.
I created a YouTube video here exclusively for dads, where I break down everything you need to know, from the right brush to use, deciphering the world of hair products, and even mastering a basic plait.
This post was all about toddler hair styles.
Perfecting toddler hair styles your kids love and have confidence in is the ultimate goal.
It’s not about pointing fingers or placing blame; it’s about coming together to celebrate and nurture their unique curls.
The road may be filled with tangles, snags, and a few hair-raising moments, but the end result will be worth it.
So, let’s comb out the neglect, brush off the misconceptions, and create toddler hair styles that will turn heads and leave a lasting impression.
The power is in your hands, or rather, in your brushes.
Thank you for being part of this important conversation and for committing to make a positive change in your child’s hair care routine.
Let’s connect on Instagram, share our stories, and continue to inspire each other as we navigate the world of toddler hair styles and beyond.
Rome wasn’t built in a day, and neither will our expertise in styling curls.
It’s a journey of growth, both for our children and ourselves.
Let’s celebrate their curls, nurture their self-confidence, and make a lasting impact on their lives.